The first-day-of-school jitters are very real, and everyone feels them, from parents to teens to little ones. Being nervous about something new is completely normal, especially when we don’t know what to expect. Whether it’s the very first day of school, coming back after summer break, or starting college and dorm life for the first time, a whirlwind of emotions often comes with the transition. Nervousness, anxiety, excitement, fear, or a mix of all of them, are all completely normal.
As parents, helping children feel seen, validating their emotions, and reminding them they have your support every step of the way can make all the difference.
Read on for a few helpful tips for handling first-day jitters together!
Mental Health Matters on the First Day
Checking in on your child’s emotional and mental wellness in the days before school starts is just as important as making sure you’ve got all the necessary supplies. Transitions can be challenging for young children, they may face changes in schedules, separation anxiety, or new social pressures. These feelings can lead to changes in behavior, so keep an eye out for signs of overwhelm. Show your support by acknowledging these feelings and having open, supportive conversations.
A Few Signs of First Day Jitters
Signs of anxiety or uneasiness can look different depending on a child’s age. Common indicators include:
- Clinginess or crying
- Stomachaches or headaches
- Trouble sleeping
- Asking repeated questions
- Nervous energy or irritability
- Withdrawing or becoming unusually quiet
- Excessive worrying
- Performance anxiety or moodiness
Recognizing these behaviors early on allows you to address them in a positive manner, have supportive conversations about feeling uneasy in new situations.
How Can Adults Help
Adults play a key role in helping children navigate the emotions of the first day of school. Here are a few ways to provide support and reassurance as well as to shift the conversation toward a more positive outlook:
- Normalize the nerves – Reassure them that feeling anxious is totally normal. Make it personal and share a story about a time you felt nervous and how you overcame it.
- Talk through the day – Walk through their schedule and what their day will look like to build familiarity and reduce fears of the unknown.
- Practice affirmations – Come up with simple affirmations to practice together each morning. Try something like, “I am brave. I love to try new things. I belong here. I am important.”
- Create a goodbye ritual – Whether it’s something as simple as a hug and kiss goodbye, or a brief note in their lunchbox, take the time to do something that’ll make them feel special and bring comfort.
- Don’t rush the morning – Chaos or pressure can add to feelings of anxiety or nervousness, so give yourself a little extra time to move about the morning calmly.
- Validate their feelings- Listen without judgement to how they’re feeling, give them a safe place to talk openly, and remind them that it is okay to feel a mix of emotions.
When to Know if Extra Support is Needed
While first-day jitters and mild anxiety are normal, it’s also important to recognize when a child may need additional support. If they continue to struggle with sleep, show ongoing signs of distress, or begin to avoid school altogether, consider connecting with a school counselor or pediatric therapist. Ask about available resources and find what works best for their needs and personality.
Navigating a wave of emotions during a transition can be challenging, especially at the start of something new. Talking about those feelings, and working through them together, can provide a strong support system for both children and parents.
